Taylors body arrived about five o'clock last evening and the dirge was sung in front of the City Hall. I know nothing about it and am rather glad for I am in no mood to see and hear these sad things. A letter from Lucy this morning telling me what makes me sadder still and what I cannot become reconciled to. I have been very sad today, thinking of Taylors funeral and the fatal words of Lucys letter that I cannot get used to and yet are so true and so entirely what I will at last have to accept. I could not get interested in my work and went out and walked the streets and tried to forget myself in the crowd in Broadway but I could not. Coming back to my room I took up the study of my large picture and at last got a little interested in it. Then I read some of Gertrudes letters written to me at Connellys during the draft riots. How she suffered that I was not with her and she always did when we were separated. May let me read Gussies letter. I came to my room and wrote to her and a note to Holt also to tell him how sadly I felt to hear of his wifes death. They took Taylors remains to Cedarcroft today. The Stoddards and Stedmans went. I could not and there was no need for me to go.
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