Tuesday, Nov 30, 1880 This morning I went up to 23rd St. and bought a ton of coal and then came to my room and opened my boxes and got out my pictures which I put in their frames and now my room looks pretty full of work. I put things away in their places as I have done each year now for twenty four years in this same place and I thought today how many times more would I do this same thing. I feel the changes that have taken place in the last two years and do not look forward to the future with a feeling of the continuance of my life here as I once did. It seems to me now that a slight thing would break up my connection here. With all the name I have made in an honest endeavor to be myself and to follow out my feelings in Art I do not feel that I have much hold here and that I should not be much missed except by a few people. I worked a little on my grey picture and improved it and then answered some letters. Mr. Pratts regarding some of Giffords pictures. Mr. Ferris a young man who wants me to look at his work. James Gifford from whom I received a letter today about a son of Josiah Tubby who wants to talk with Vaux about the study of architecture and Mrs Leggett who wants my name in relation to some readings for her reading room. I asked Guy in to see my pictures but he and I see things very differently. This evening called at Platts. Saw Mrs. Platt but Platt had gone to see Sarah Bernhardt. I am afraid I will not see her. I have very little money and no immediate prospect of any and this begins to trouble me. Came to my room early and went to bed with a lonely, homeless feeling hardly knowing how to get rid of the time.
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