Monday, Aug 16, 1886 Sara went out to visit Janette Hubbard and her sister Emily this morning. I walked down with her and went over the ferry and put her on the train, the West Shore trains not making connection with the train from Utica to Waterville. Sara needs rest and recreation and I hope she will find it there as I think she will. I stopped at the bank and paid my note of $300 I was obliged to have discounted in May, I also pd. Tom today and now my bank account is alarmingly low and with a family of ten to provide for most of the time. It frightens me but there is no use refusing. I am going to N. Y. tomorrow for my sketches and studies and hope to be able to get to work producing something in my studio here. I am occasionally reading in Amiels Journal. His lack of will and his dread of acting and deciding I recognise in myself, a frightful dread of responsibility except in certain directions. It has been grey & cloudy and this evening it rained copiously.
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