Jervis McEntee Diaries

Sunday October 31, 1886

Jervis McEntee Diary Entry, October 31, 1886, from the Jervis McEntee papers, 1850-1905, in the Archives of American Art, Smithsonian Institution

Sunday, Oct 31, 1886 October is gone and I have got but little from that time of the year which was always so full of repose for me. I find myself torn with anxieties, dissatisfied most with myself and of little comfort to any one else. Am I to lapse into a morose and gloomy man or is there some reasonable road to greater content and serenity. I went in to see my father today. He sat in his chair almost oblivious to all about him. I asked him if he was ever lonely and he said sometimes he was. I told him I was too and he said it would not be a great while before we were all on the other side and strangers would be living here. He feels sad over Lucys going away and thinks he will never see her again but I told him she was not going so far this time which seemed to cheer him. It makes me sad to see how nearly all earthly interests cease to touch him and yet at times she shows this is not absolutely the case. John McEntee called just as he was going to retire and he regretted he could not see him. Mary and I walked down to Johns just before tea and saw Aunt Christina. John had gone out but he came up and spent the evening with us. It was raining this morning and has been unsettled all day until towards evening when it cleared. I wrote to Weir and commenced a letter to Booth but thought I might see him in N. Y. The time of Lucys departure draws near and we all dread it and the loneliness which will follow. Mary goes tomorrow. Girard, Mary and Jimmy were here at dinner today.