Wednesday, Apr 16, 1890 Rather cold and blustery this morning. I awoke feeling depressed and unhappy and that I am gradually being drawn out of the city where I once had some reputation and position as an artist. I am making my preparations to leave and feel that if I never return I will not be missed by many. I went over to Marys for breakfast. Clara Baker was there. She and Marion had been to a reception at Mrs. Stoddards last night to which I was invited. I regret I was not here to go for I would have met many old friends whom I never see now. After breakfast went up to the Academy and saw Galt. He talked quite in a discouraging view. Met Shurtleff there. Says he cant go into the country until he gets some money. I dont see how artists live who depend on their art. I went from the Academy over to Buberles to see the figure of the sailor for the Ulster Co. monument. It looked very well and I have written to Sharpe giving it my approval. I went up to Dr. Patchens in the afternoon to return the two books he lent me and also to report on my progress. I have felt very weak of late but I am inclined to think I have caught cold as my muscles are stiff and sore. He said that from all my symptoms he would suspect heart trouble but that he could discern no trace of it nor any trouble with my lungs and still thinks I am likely to recover. Dr. Taylor was there having returned from Mexico earlier than he intended on account of the sudden death of the landlord of his hotel. When I returned I found under my door the card of Mr. & Mrs. Kenneth Cranford. I had a very nice note from him which I found on my return from home Wednesday saying they would call again this week. Spent the evening at Marys and Downing and I walked over together. Tomorrow I shall begin to pack my things and arrange my room to leave it.
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